i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
