they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
The Olympian is in my bed
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
