Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Randomize