Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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