Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Randomize
