it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
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