The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize