I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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