bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
