Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
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