I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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