i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
