She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
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