i would punch a child for taco bell
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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