I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
