I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Randomize
