So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
