but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
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