5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
