Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
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