He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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