No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
It's rum buckets o'clock
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
