She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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