Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
