I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
