Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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