I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
