I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
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