just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
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