Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
