I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
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