Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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