sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
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I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
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