Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
