There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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