Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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