Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize
