I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
