I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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