Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
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