Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
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i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
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Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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