worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
