Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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