I need help removing her.
Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Randomize
