i'm lost and i look like a hooker
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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