I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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