I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
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