My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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