can we get nightvision for the apartment?
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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