how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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