its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
now i know why i became what i already was.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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