and you said cock pushups were impossible
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
