i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Randomize
